In what can only be described as a landmark moment for Indian traffic jams, Tesla has officially opened its first showroom in Mumbai, offering cars starting from a humble ₹60 lakh — or, as Mumbaikars call it, “just a one-bedroom in Thane.”

Excited buyers with disposable income and a deep hatred for petrol pumps are already lining up, iPhone in one hand, environmental guilt in the other.

🚗 Tesla in Mumbai: Now You Can Be Stuck in Traffic Silently

The arrival of Tesla means that Mumbaikars can now enjoy all the joys of bumper-to-bumper traffic—but without engine noise! Instead of honking, Teslas will now politely whisper, “I’m better than you,” as they roll past Marutis in Bandra.

Elon Musk is reportedly thrilled. “India is an exciting market,” he said. “Especially Mumbai, where there’s enough demand for luxury vehicles and not nearly enough roads to drive them on.”

💰 Pricing: Affordable for Everyone Whose Father Owns Land in South Bombay

With prices starting at ₹60 lakh, the new showroom is expected to cater to:

• Tech bros,
• Film producers,
• Crypto survivors, and
• People who thought Ola S1 was a stepping stone to Elon.

Rumor has it, for ₹1.2 crore, Tesla India will throw in a personalized feature that plays “Namo Namo” when the car starts.

🔌 Charging Infrastructure? Lol, What’s That?

When asked about India’s EV charging infrastructure, Tesla responded with confidence: “We believe the Indian spirit of jugaad will prevail.” Early adopters are already planning to charge their Teslas using kitchen inverters, neighbors’ sockets, or emotional energy from their parents’ disappointment.

A local resident in Andheri said, “I can’t charge my phone during load shedding, but sure, let’s get a Tesla.”

🤖 Self-Driving in Mumbai? Good Luck.

Self-driving Tesla in Mumbai is expected to be a thrilling experience. Early testing has shown the car becoming sentient, questioning its life decisions, and ultimately abandoning all driving attempts near Dadar station.

Beta mode was deactivated after the car tried to “recalculate” its route and ended up parked inside a vada pav stall.

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Disclaimer:
This article is purely satirical and for entertainment purposes only. We admire Tesla’s innovation and welcome them to India—despite our sarcasm, potholed roads, and occasional cow crossings. No EVs were harmed in the writing of this joke. ⚡😄