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🪙 India’s Inflation Hits 6-Year Low, Government Throws Confetti, Mango Prices Stay the Same

In what economists are calling “good news we probably won’t feel in real life,” India’s retail inflation has reportedly cooled to a six-year low in June. Experts say this is a huge achievement, while the common man continues to stare at the price of tomatoes with silent judgment.

📉 Inflation Falls, But Somehow Everything Still Costs More

According to official data, the Consumer Price Index (CPI) has dropped—though no one seems to have informed the sabziwala, the gas agency, or your local Zomato delivery guy who now charges ₹80 to bring biryani from just 1.3 km away.

A government spokesperson cheerfully announced:

“Inflation is down! Rejoice!”
To which the nation responded:
“Bhai, doodh toh abhi bhi ₹72 litre hai”

🥦 Vegetables Helped Bring It Down — Except in Your Kitchen

The report says vegetable prices fell, leading the decline in inflation. This came as a shock to most Indians, who are still mentally recovering from last year’s onions hitting luxury-item status. One woman in Delhi said:

“If prices are falling, can someone tell my bhajiwala to stop quoting rates like he’s selling gold futures?”

Meanwhile, economists are congratulating themselves on TV debates using graphs no one understands, while viewers desperately try to connect “CPI” with “why my electricity bill went up again.”

💼 Finance Ministry: “Things Are Better Now, Please Clap”

Officials say the government’s policies are working, and the low inflation figure is proof of a stable economy. Rumor has it that the Finance Ministry has printed new posters that say:

“Feeling poor? It’s just a vibe. Inflation is low.”

However, when asked if salaries would go up or if restaurant bills would stop including surprise service charges, officials quickly changed the subject to India’s moon mission.

🙃 The Common Man Reacts

Here’s what regular citizens had to say:

  • “Inflation is down? Cool. Can you tell my landlord?”
  • “I checked. Maggi is still ₹15.”
  • “Wake me up when Uber stops charging ₹600 for a 3km ride during mild rain.”

Disclaimer:
This article is a piece of satire meant for humorous and entertainment purposes only. The economic data is real, the sarcasm is intentional, and the emotional damage from grocery shopping is very much shared. We fully respect the work of economists, even if their charts don’t match our monthly budgets. 😅📊

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